“Stay”
No one knows the pain I’m in, because I smile and act happy. I put on a really good act, so no one knows how much I’m hurting. How I go home and cry for hours and think about you all day long. No one knows how much you matter how much I love you how alone I am how empty I am. No one knows how lost i am without you… All we’ve been through I can’t help but think its because we are meant to be together. People don’t just go through all we’ve gone through without it meaning something. I hope one day we find our way back to each other because without you in my life I’m falling apart…
I’m starting to get the fear that what if I wake up one day and my eyes won’t open. What if I’m blind? What will I do how will I survive? How will I see all the beauty in the world? How will I be able to see the memories of my life our life? What if I wake up one day and I see nothing…. And even worse what if I wake up one day and remember nothing. What if my mind starts over? What if I can’t remember what my life was like who I loved who inspired me who loved me back the reasons I am who I am? What if my whole life is erased? That is my fear. To have a life I can’t remember. I pray everyday they find a cure because that is ultimately my destiny if they don’t. Please find a cure please change this tragic disease.
I loved you once
I’ve loved you always
I’ll love you forever
In the mist of a broke heart your still all I think about in each moment of my life your everything that made sense your everything that felt right
That day… That day in the car for some reason it keeps replaying it was so long ago so many years ago it meant nothing but it started everything sitting there I felt like I could tell you anything and you’d listen because you cared who I was before you didn’t matter you just wanted to get to know the person I am now and that gave me hope that for once someone wasn’t going to judge my past they just wanted to know me the real me the me that no one knew. I still miss you and I don’t know if the pain of missing you will ever go away… What if this is it for me what if your it? I wish I knew what my life had in store for me so I could feel at ease I know life doesn’t work like that. So ill sit and wait and believe that one day ill find peace and happiness.
I still love you and I know that Im always going to be in love with you because your the one for me your my best friend i think about you every minute of the day when it’s just you and me together it’s amazing I was lost before i met you and now I’m lost without you…
Everyone is moving on and I feel like I’m standing still… Everyone’s changing and I’m exactly the same… I wonder if ill ever be able to move forward with my life, make something of myself. Because right now I feel like time is passing and I’m here frozen unable to move…. Something’s got to change. This is becoming unbearable…
what do you do when the person you’ve gone through it all with isnt there anymore…. who do I tell my secrets to now… I miss you everyday…
& I just wanna tell you… it takes everything in me not to call you… & I wish I could run to you… & I hope you know that everytime I don’t I almost do…. I bet you think I moved on… I bet it never even occurred to you that I can’t say hello to you and risk another goodbye… & I hope sometimes you wonder about me…. & I just wanna tell you it takes everything in me not to call you… ♥
You don’t love me I can’t stop loving you… Make the pain stop… Help me forget… Help me move on…
for a long time i put how i was feeling out of my head i focused on the things i needed to focus on i tried to live my life the best i could. but things are not ok im not ok im hurting everyday the pain gets worse and nothing and no one is making it better. everyday more and more things break me more and more things make me want to die. im so lonely. i fear that no one will ever really love me the real me. i fear that ill never be good enough for anyone.. im so afraid ill be alone forever. everyday i try to put a smile on my face and push through the day and find good in everything i do, but im just not happy. its not just that im not happy but im in severe pain. i cry myself to sleep most nights. and some nights i dont even sleep at all. i cant stop thinking about how empty and lonely i am. im broken inside. its not ok anymore. im not ok… i need help..
I would really like some heart shaped glasses… Sunglasses. The Katy Perry movie was amazing… Passing math is probably the hardest thing I’ll ever do…. I really miss my best friend… I wish I had someone to talk to… I finally understand that I’m all alone in this world and i am the reason I succeed or fail not anyone else…. I love to dance when I’m alone…. I love to sing at the top of my lungs in the car…. Mainly to country…. I’m so excited for won’t back down I don’t even care I’ll be seeing it alone… I miss you all day long…. Do you miss me? Im getting more angry… Teaching is much harder then I ever imagined it would be…. i miss home…. Random thoughts of my day…. <3
